this is.. the perfect analogy well done anon
Thank you!! Haesoo and Joowon have been emotionally stunted since that moment his mom caught them. Haesoo’s gotta really acknowledge how that moment hurt him so he can move on. Until then, he’ll always be in these short lived and unfulfilling relationships while carrying all this resentment towards Joowon.
Idk this makes sense so much. Like its perfect.
Thank you for saying this. I’ve always said this people fail to realize that Haesoo and Joowon relationship was the way it was because that’s how they wanted it to be. They both had a hand in it they wanted to be in each other’s lives so bad that each person picked their roles for that relationship to work so it always confused why everyone blamed Joowon for their relationship being toxic :/ .
A lot of people just read what’s on the surface and fail to really grasp the characters’ and author’s intent. It’s quite sad because it doesn’t take much effort to see they were both acting. I think Yeongha made it quite clear the type of relationship they were in. As you said, both were responsible and both were self destructive because they didn’t know how to communicate to each other what they wanted. Either out of fear or out of never knowing how a proper romantic relationship should work.
Throughout all these years, Joowon has been the only one self-aware enough to know that he’s been playing a role in order to stay close to the one he loves. Even if the relationship was fucked up and toxic, he’d rather have that than lose Haesoo 100%. So he resolved to playing the bad guy in front of everyone.
To their parents he was probably the hyung who led Haesoo astray. To Haesoo he’s willing to be the jerk who led him into this messy relationship and “walks all over him”. But doing all of that kept it from becoming too real. It kept the consequences of their actions from taking them to the point of no return.
But now that Joowon has left the stage and is realizing that the role he’s been playing all these years hasn’t helped either of them, Haesoo is left all alone with no one to help shoulder the misery of their separation.
Haesoo was never willing to leave Joowon. He plays like he will and gets into meaningless relationships to convince himself that there are options outside of Joowon, but to truly leave him would be to face the depth of the love he has for him. Haesoo is always running away because he’s afraid Joowon doesn’t love him as much as he loves Joowon. Taku and Taku’s exhibition finally brought Haesoo face to face with the gravity of his relationship with Joowon.
They’ve been in love for a decade. It wasn’t just sex and it wasn’t just experimentation. They genuinely loved each other, but because of their family circumstances, they had to bury that love and disfigure it. If Haesoo convinces himself that he just fooled around with his step-brother and the sex was so good that he just kept doing it, then it would be easier to get through life. It’s easier to pretend that it’s just a messy fling, not a love that would require him to sacrifice everything.
The bitter truth is, Haesoo is deeply in love with someone he can’t be with. Joowon has been the only person who has supported Haesoo, comforted him, been with him at his best and his worst. Joowon sees Haesoo the way no one else does or is willing to. So now that Joowon has gotten off the stage, Haesoo can no longer play the part of the scorned lover or misled dongsaeng. He has to finally face himself and be honest about his true feelings for Joowon. I think he’s crying because he’s been running away from this sinking feeling of not being able to be with Joowon since Joowon told his mother “ we’re just joking around”