The thing is it’s understandable to some degree but it really doesn’t negate common sense. Unless Jan is a new born child or brain dead you don’t leave someone to possibly die in their pool of love to have sex. There’s isn’t a plausible excuse for that. It’s not a question of Jan cheating on Jamil or Jan have to be unpack feelings he’s uncertain of. It’s the barest minimum logic of Jan willingly went to a motel to have sex with a complete stranger, he was in control of the situation enough to voice this despite the Pheromones excuse. And even now we see he has not once visited Jamil in the hospital since Jan and pray ‘s sex and then some. Jan clearly through his actions even if it’s not the author’s intentions shows he could care less about Jamil and only needs the attention and affection of another person to carry on where simply anyone will do. If that’s the case how did Jan survive this long without Jamil if he’s that starved for attention he’ll ignore all reasonable logic? Again it makes Jan to appear horribly selfish more than anything because we have the author even showing the self awareness of this through Griffin as the voice of reason this chapter. But then ultimately excusing it as normal because of his sob backstory. You can like him but logically Jan’s not a root worthy character with such a fickle consternation.
I agree.
Dude... There are so many people attacking the crap out of Jan. Like, yes, I'm disappointed in how he handled the entire thing - as well. However. HOWEVER. Go back to when he was a child, where the white-haired boy was already messing with Jan's definition/understanding of relationships. He had no healthy relationship to look up to, being that his parents were dead and the family who took him in (although nice) didn't love him like he NEEDED.
He is also an ADULT who has never had a real relationship, with either a man or woman, and growing up only had (what we can tell) 2 "friends."
This boy doesn't even know what a healthy friendship is. He went from having (at this time) 1 friend, to having a person BONDED with him. Bonding isn't even a real relationship. It sounds a lot like imprinting, which is what BABY DUCKS do when they hatch. Also. Jamil doesn't even fully understand what he's feeling until someone explains it to him.
Jamil gave the Jan the ability to understand what he deserves - love - and Pray has helped Jan understand that he's not a complete sociopath but a confused child.
I love Jamil. I will always love him. And I'm saddned by how Jan handled everything, but it is UNDERSTANDABLE.
Thanks for coming to my TED talk.