nobody has to forgive their abuser simply because they're repenting. nothing will change the past, and when someone treats their family (a child at that) that way for years without stopping for a second to think "maybe i should act differently" said family member has every right to return the favor. of course you can choose to forgive, but it doesn't make you a bad person not to. (btw not here to argue, just wanted to give my take on it)
very well said mr/ms universe.
It’s ok. I appreciate your opinion. :) People always can choose what they think is best for them. To forgive or not to forgive. That’s why I said nobody’s perfect. People can live their whole lives without stopping and thinking for a sec what they did wrong. But there are “degrees” that we should consider too. One is always worse or better than the other. (Example: just knowing your mother is cheating with a neighbor VS caught your mother cheating by sucking neighbor’s dick) just a sample. Obviously, what do you think is worse? Which one is more traumatizing?
Looking at what happened to the FL and Father, for me, it’s not to such a degree that things are irreversible. She wasn’t abused to be taken advantage of. She wasn’t neglected by a mentally/psychologically competent father. It was a situation that was very unfortunate for both parties. I guess my point is, you can choose to forgive knowing these things or be cold blooded until the end because you think they don’t deserve them at all.
I do get your point but those 2 examples are completely the same. Her whole childhood she was blamed for something she could not control like being in the room when her mother died. The father is the adult in this situation and though hurt he should have thought about how traumatized the FL was to watch something like that at such a young age and then continue to obviously blame and ignore her whole existence and effort to be the only sane and mature person at such a young age and her having to grow up seeing that and that man only changing just because she changed her attitude towards him is just wow I think she had every right not to forgive him even on his death bed. She had to live years the way she was treated and now that his dying he wants to relieve his guilt and feels entitled to forgiveness.
Hmmm in the story, he didn’t want to feel relief from his guilt only when he was dying. Hmmm. He tried the moment he realized though? Also, he didn’t demanded forgiveness so you can say that he felt entitled to receive it. :) hmmmm.
I get what you’re saying that adults are the expected mature folks etc etc etc. it’s been the culture, customary, expectations for centuries. But let’s do some real talk, maturity doesn’t come with age. I can see many mature kids nowadays compared to their parents. Just go to tiktok. Gen Z posting to tiktok their daily struggles while baby girl prepare her breakfast cereal in the background. But going back to the main point, like what i said, they’ve both been in unfortunate events. One was abused/blamed/neglected, while the other was the unstable abuser. Obviously, the FL had it much worse. The abuser’s punishment is to carry the guilt for the rest of their lives, forgiven or unforgiven. It’ll haunt them. Fast forward, the FL in the story proved to be a smart and mature woman but she convinced her self that her father didn’t deserve forgiveness. Again, going to my previous reply, to what degree did the FL consider that she couldn’t forgive her father? Was she used as a sex slave, toy, punching bag? Was she sold off to the opposing country as a maid? Was she brutally starved for days? Was EVERYONE around her abusing her to feel such detachment? No.
She was neglected, yes. But she was smarter than her father. She was more mature than her father. She knew she didn’t do anything wrong and her father did. Her father wasn’t the best father. But the Father realized his error, he tried for the rest of his life, to make amends, it’s not a one day thing where he just says “ok, u dont want it, fine”. He tried to show and convey many times in the only way he knew. Again going to my previous reply, she can forgive him knowing these things or convince herself that her father doesn’t deserve them
But let me be clear, i hate the father for what he did too. It’s awful and disgusting. My point is about forgiveness. :)
So I completely understand where you’re coming from! But you can’t simply expect her to forgive him when she had clearly stated he had not apologized! He’s just doing things to make her happy not actually saying “my child I have wronged you I’m sorry” pleasing her with her request and gifts doesn’t change that.
The fact that he has a smooth fucking brain even when she had reincarnated despite being the emperor who could bend laws at will. he still chose to try to force her to do things she was NOT okay with and got upset when she yelled at him get real
You can always forgive but you will NEVER forget you can’t honestly look at how he treated her while raising that annoying brat of a son and expect her to be like oh well I can see he’s sorry so I guess it’s okay to forgive him ERRRRT WRONG
She honestly has my praise because she still loved and raised had a little brother ON HER OWN even though he was such a asshole and a lil bitch in her past life couldn’t and wouldn’t be me
What I understood from the novel is that even after all the cutesy things for her and self-loathing her father did, FL didn’t forgive him even when he was on his deathbed. I get that she suffered from her previous life because the father pushed all his anger onto her before but yo, nobody’s perfect, always in their best condition and makes the right decisions everytime. I think I’d do the same as FL if her father wasn’t making any efforts to win her back and continued disregarding her as his daughter but nope, not in this case. Her father clearly wanted to make amends but FL is too cold on that part alone.
I like this story not just this part.