PREACH
btw the part where "fetishizing is wrong" thing, im pertaining to some (not all) gay men who read bl and keep saying that girls reading bl i wrong. i've seen some arguements where they say smth abt bl/yaoi and defend themselves and say that they're "gay" i mean, yes okay but you're consuming something that is made by a woman. so get it ig. plus, the fact that bl, and yaoi are literally audienced for women. they were made for women to watch and read. and you say that is wrong? i really dont get it
As I gay man I completely agree with you. There’s literally nothing you said that I disagree with.
So many people (mainly men) attack woman who simply just read BL. Their arguments always make it sound like gay relationships aren’t normal.
BL and GL isn’t strictly for gay people lmao. There’s tons of great stories that deserve recognition. Most BL (I mainly read BL so I can only speak on this) -don’t portray real mlm relationships, however it’s good for people to read these stories and normalize our relationships.
Trying to say “woman can’t read BL because they aren’t gay men.” Makes no sense to me. They all read/watch straight romance? What’s the difference? Gay relationships are normal, just as normal as straight. The only difference is that it’s people of the same gender.
And tbh idk if someone reads BL to fetishize. If they only fetishize the BL relationships and not actual gay men, I don’t really care. It doesn’t involve me. It’s only a problem when they start to expect gay relationships to be like BL, start to obsess with random gay men, and have these high expectations of our relationships. I also don’t agree with “shipping” straight men together. Like it’s uncomfortable.. you get the same feeling as being “shipped” with a sibling.
as a fellow bl reader, and apparently a "fetishizer" I think that there are things that are misused and some misunderstanding in this issue. I think that when ppl say that they read a certain genre like mlm and wlw, some people instantly say that you are a fetishizer.
how about we put it this way. when ppl say "i like eating donut every day! I truly adore donuts. I'm extremely obsessed in eating donuts" you say that they're a 'donut lover' --- that's fetishizing. but then how about we say, "oh I like eating donuts. I don't eat certain flavors of donuts. I eat them occasionally." this is a different take.
the first example is fetishizing. like forreal getting turned on in wlw/mlm. in some extremes like watching gay porn, and lesbian porn and yet being an opposite gender. and the second one is like, admiring things (?) I really dk how to word it, but like, "yes I swim but I'm not a professional" take and there are some readers who are mistaken like this, and get bullied or things.
some people are saying that "fetishizing is wrong reading gay men who fuck is wrong you're a girl you fetishize gay men" half of the yaoi, bl industry where authors and artist are women. you are reading two guys fucking together written by a lady and drawn by a lady. but when men literally watch and read yuri they are labeled as "hot and good in bed (?) things" and a half--not half, all of the yuri, even hentai are made by men. and if you criticize about the yaoi industry so much and take a blind eye in yuri/hentai industry you're a fucking misogynist.
fetishizing is a disease, please do take this in mind. it is not curable (as far as I've researched) some people might not realize that they have this, and some might already know and are struggling with it. and I think it will benefit you if you keep it private, and try to lessen the time you take on watching/reading things :))
some people learned what fetishizing is, and ran with it. (do correct me if I'm wrong with things. these are just my opinion and pls respect it)